Mad Men Blog, Season IV, Ep 1 Public Relations

Welcome back, loyal readers (or newcomers) to the next few months of blog posts examining season IV of Mad Men. As this blog is dedicated to allowing all of us to gain a slightly deeper understanding of Mad Men, I urge you to send your comments, questions, criticisms and corrections (goodness knows, I make many mistakes, more so as I hurry to send out this blog for your inspection early each Monday). I thank you in advance for reading and your comments.

So, let’s dive in. Last night’s opening ep was loaded with many of the elements—strong writing, fine production values, apposite music, good acting—we expect from this series, although it fell short of last season’s opener. The 2009 opening ep was nearly flawless in its pace and content. And not a word was wasted. Still, we received plenty to chew on last night (it would be done best with false teeth, however, as you’ll see below).

The Preliminaries: Based on Don’s date Bethany Van Nuys’s (the wonderful Anna Camp) mention of Andrew Goodman losing his life in Mississippi working for civil rights (he was killed in June 1964 trying to register black voters) and Don’s telling The Wall St Journal reporter about the firm’s good fortune “months” after founding the new Sterling, Cooper, Draper and Pryce), we know we’ve moved on at least 1 year from last season, to 1964 apparently.

Also new is a spunky copywriter Joey Baird (Matt Long), who’s working with Peggy. Is this a working relationship or do we smell romance here? The two clearly get along on a certain level. Note their little gag, with performing Stan Freberg’s song parody of soap opera drudgery (“John…Marsha”).

And Celia, Don’s new housekeeper, starts off her Mad Men career with a bang, talking sotto voce about Don’s not eating anything and leaving his (shoe) shine kit in the middle of the floor of his dark apartment (more on interior lighting below). We want to see more of Celia’s sarcasm, she seems great.

One of the motifs in this opening episode is starting over. Don and Betty are starting new lives. Don’s professional life is new, too, new firm, new clients, new women to conquer. This life ‘mulligan’ is a creative piece of work from Mad Men creator Matthew Weiner, a point made a few weeks ago in The NY Times by Alessandra Stanley.

The night’s overarching theme follows closely from the previous 3 seasons and concerns an idea running through many of Hitchcock’s films—things are not always what they appear. For Mad Men, this could be modified to ‘there are a lot of people slinging bull around.’ And, yes, that bull is abundant in an episode’s titled Public Relations probably is not a coincidence.

The Opening Scene: The word is that we’re going to learn much about Don Draper’s life this season. Knowing that, Matt Weiner’s opening scene was brilliant. The screen goes black and we hear the Ad Age reporter asking the $64,000 question: ‘Who is Don Draper?’ Will we ever know the answer?

But from there we go quickly to the night’s, and one of the series’, main themes, falseness, lies, deceit, whatever way you wish to describe the enormous load of untruths that permeate the lives of the characters and situations in Mad Men.

Don gets the falseness off to a quick start by failing to correct the Ad Age reporter, Jack Hammond, regarding the facts of his life: “knockout wife, 2 kids, house in Westchester…”

Then the two discuss the Glo-Coat TV commercials that Don devised to intentionally mislead people. He didn’t want them to think they were watching a commercial, “at least not for the first 30 seconds,” he says. And those first 30 seconds, which we see later in the episode, show a little boy seemingly in jail. “Let me out of here,” he cries. Actually he’s under his mother’s kitchen table. Is the boy a representative of Don’s unpleasant childhood? Of Don’s disgust with himself for messing things up to such an extent that he’s alone in a Greenwich Village apartment on Thanksgiving?

After the reporter’s false step, the journalists heaps on the falseness motif-he’s got a false leg, courtesy of Korea. After the reporter hobbles away, Roger Sterling chimes in with another example of falsehood. He notes his uncle lost a leg hitching a trailer. “He used to ask me to scratch his toes—he didn’t have any.”

Immediately after that Roger, Don and Pete Campbell head to the Jantzen “party,” as Don calls it. Another falsehood. In reality it’s a cattle call—the type of set-up that Don would not have had to lower himself to attend previously, but now, as a “scrappy upstart,” Sterling Cooper Draper and Pryce has to grin and bear this sort of thing. At any rate, the meeting is with the sportswear company Jantzen, whose prudish owners insist they’re “a family company,” despite the fact that they manufacture the suggestive outer garment known as a bikini, er, two-piece swimsuit (hey, this is still 1964, remember). But are Jantzen’s garment’s revealing? Well, they passed the Roger Sterling test. “I’ve spent a lot of time with the catalog…I’d say no concerns at all,” Roger coos suggestively. After that, upon entering the new S,C,D, P offices (more on the new space below), even Sterling complains of Jantzen’s falseness. “I love how they sit there like a couple of choirboys, you know one of them is leaving NY with V.D.,” he tells Don.

Later, falsehood again comes to the fore with Don’s presentation to Jantzen, when he argues there’s little difference between a bathing suit and underwear. The cut and the print of the cloth, and “some sort of gentlemen’s agreement.” In other words, nothing. Ultimately, as we know, Don can’t stand the falseness and explodes. Is he reacting to the Jantzen people, who are selling sex but insist they’re not? To the false nature of advertising? To the falseness of his created life, whose layers are beginning to be peeled back by Ad Age?

The other major piece of falsehood last night came courtesy of Peggy Olson, who always seems to be struggling on some level. It’s she who hatches the idea to stage some sort of incident to keep ham purveyor Sugarberry happy. Eventually the team settles on paying actresses to pretend to be fighting over a ham before Thanksgiving.

(Yes, yes, I know what you’re thinking—Peggy has always longed for Draper, played by Jon Hamm, so here’s a case of art imitating life imitating art, right? Sorry, I don’t buy it. Just a coincidence. What is not coincidence is that right after Don gets only to first base with Bethany in the cab, one of Peggy’s hired actresses, sitting with Peggy in a diner, says, referring to her acting partner, “She doesn’t know when to stop.”)

The New Digs: At first blush the scene upon entering the new offices seems hokey and purposeless. On second thought it goes directly to Dorothy Rabinowitz’s point that the office in Mad Men is where things are cool, lights are bright, there’s lots of glass and chrome, people move about with determination and energy. It’s a cool place. At home, however, things are different. Their interiors are drab and dimly lit. Look at Don’s new bachelor pad, a dark, funereal place. Definitely not cool.

The falsehood theme also finds its way into architecture with the new office’s so-called 2nd floor. Cooper wants “no part of” this fabrication, but Don uses it to his advantage (we assume) in his 2nd of two press interviews (at the show’s end). The phantom 2nd floor also figures (pun intended) into Don’s pitch to Jantzen (see below).

Another Voice of Truth: In an episode with falsehood at its core, in a series populated by a bevy of bull slingers, with little Sally Draper the lone voice of truth, Henry’s mother, Pauline (Pamela Dunlap) is a welcome addition to the fold. She shoots from the hip for the most part. Pauline figured out Betty quickly (“She’s a silly woman”) and speaks her mind to her son, if a bit ruthlessly (“I know what you see in her, and you could have gotten it without marrying”) and with a large dose of meddlesome-ness (“Honestly, Henry, I don’t know how you can stand living in that man’s dirt”).

It’s interesting that she and little Sally, the only straight shooters in the bunch, begin their relationship being at odds with each during Thanksgiving. We’re hoping for an alliance.

Speaking of the truth, Peggy’s office scene with Don might be the most honest of the night. Since the ham thing blew over, the agency’s reputation is intact, Peggy says after Don tells her, “I try to stay away from those kinds of shenanigans.” (True, Don, but you’re hardly a saint.) Later Don says she brought her date to his (Don’s) apartment on Thanksgiving Day to get the ham payoff money because she thought (Don) wouldn’t embarrass her. “At least I’m thinking ahead,” she says. “It doesn’t always work, does it?” Don answers. And then Peggy’s coda: We’re all here for you, Don, just to please you.

Dandy Don: Oh, Don. You’ve made such progress. You’re handling the divorce with a tremendous amount of class, allowing Betty and her new husband to squat freely in the former chez Draper. And you seem to be improving your parenting skills, you hug and kiss the kids, you look at them longingly when you put them to bed, you can sew enough to attach a button (presumably in a pinch you cook a bit, too). At least in comparison to that icy cold ex-wife of yours, you are the better parent. (Although, sure, that’s not too much of a compliment. And in truth, prior to your divorce, you were a parent on the weekends only. Running the house and raising the kids were Betty’s jobs, right?)

Oh, and Don, have you become a prude? When you accountant asks, “So, how’s your balls? Are you enjoying yourself? “ you blush. Although you admit to Roger when he’s trying to set you up that “I’ve hardly been a Monk.”

On the other hand, you’re still Don, er Dick. Whomever. Your “plans” on Thanksgiving include holing up in your Greenwich Village bachelor pad and having your prostitute slap your face (“harder”) while she earns her money astride you. Anybody want to comment on what all that means? A thought: Don simply is thankful for hookers with a good right hook.

Saturday Night Live: Clearly Weiner’s been watching Jon Hamm’s flair for comedy on several Saturday Night Live gigs. So he’s given Don a few subtle comic lines. First was his jab at the Jantzen boss for having to make the same case multiple times during the cattle call. “Next time just have 1 meeting.” Another funny line came at Henry’s expense, when they’re discussing Betty and Henry and the kids living in Don’s house and Henry says, “It’s temporary.” And Don retorts, “Trust me, everybody thinks this is temporary.”

Another good shot comes during the early chat with Cooper, regarding the conference table. Cooper says a client thought “a circle of chairs (instead of a conference table) demands a conversation.” Don shoots back, “About why there is no table.”

Roger’s Still Sterling: Roger and Don seem to have made up and Roger’s witty mouth endures. A few examples:
* Roger on Ad Age: “They’re so cheap, they can’t even afford a whole reporter.” (Do people really speak about print reporters like that?)
* Roger on how to treat women: In Don’s office, Roger describes Jane’s friend Bethany for Don—she looks like Virginia Mayo, is 25 years old, Mt Holyoke gymnastics team. Go out with her the weekend before Thanksgiving and if you hit it off, “come Turkey day, maybe you can stuff her.”
* Roger on interviewing: He berates Don for not cooperating with the Ad Age reporter. “You turned all the sizzle from Glo-Coat into a wet fart. Plus, you sound like a prick.”

Of course, Roger and Don both whack at the reporter. After reading the article, Don says: “I learned a valuable lesson…stay away from one-legged reporters.” Roger: “Yeah, I was thinking about that. Who is he to criticize anybody?” And later, noting Bethany liked Don on the first date despite his being “a bit grabby in the car,” he says, “Maybe you should have fondled Peg-leg Pete?”

First Date: Note before Don leaves his apartment for the date—“the first that Roger was involved in”—he makes certain his bed spread is nice and neat. Was Don expecting something to happen on that bed? Hmmm…Also note two incidences of car romance in this episode. Henry is successful, getting Betty in the garage. (Oh, heavens, sex in the car!) Meanwhile Don gets a juicy lip sandwich from Bethany in a taxi, which seems a pretty thorough tonsillectomy, but is not enough for an exasperated Don. Maybe he has been a monk?

A few words about actress Anna Camp, who plays Bethany. This was yet another nice casting job by Weiner and his crew. Camp was terrific as Sarah Newlin in HBO’s True Blood, where she played the wife of a religious zealot leader. Her character in that series switched between being prim and chaste and being a sexually overheated philanderer. That experience should have prepared her well for work on Mad Men, where complicated characters are a staple.

Notes: [Some parts of this section were updated on July 28 as a result of comments from readers. We thank them for the insights.] Gotta love the manipulation of the press by Don (in his 2nd interview at the end of the show) and by Pete Campbell in the ham incident (getting a false story planted in The Daily News). Roger caps the whole thing off and ties into the night’s main theme when he hands a copy of the Ad Age piece to Don saying: “You know, nobody who’s been associated with an actual event has thought it’s been honestly portrayed in the newspaper.” That should get TV critics and bloggers buzzing. — Interesting bit when the older Jantzen guy asks to put his feet up on the table during Don’s pitch. A classless act from someone representing a family company, right? Go ahead, Roger blurts out, “Pretend like it’s your living room.” Seems everyone’s pretending in this episode. – Speaking of the Jantzen pitch, funny how it returns to the false 2nd floor in Sterling, Cooper, Draper & Pryce’s offices. Don’s tagline on the Jantzen ad is that the company’s swimsuit (or the model wearing it) “is so well built, we can’t show you the 2nd floor.” – Three Jewish mentions: the earlier mention of slain civil rights worker Andrew Goodman; Pete’s trashing of Sugarberry for test marketing some of its hams in Jewish neighborhoods (“they’re idiots,” he says of Sugarberry, knowing traditional Jewish dietary laws prohibit the eating of pork products); and Harry’s telling Joan that his trip to Hollywood was not a vacation. “I had a lot of “tsuris” from Lucy and Desi,” he says to her. Tsuris is a Yiddish word meaning trouble or aggravation. I’m guessing Weiner is showing the acceptance of Yiddish words as part of the vernacular by 1964. Recall that in the series’ first show, which depicted 1961, Sterling Cooper was nearly devoid of Jews. Both Roger and Don swore they’d never “hired one.” The office was scoured to find a token Jew, mail room employee David Coen, to attend a meeting with a Jewish client, Rachel Menkin (Maggie Siff) of Menkin’s department store. Don entered the meeting and introduced himself to Coen, unaware that he was a fellow Sterling Cooper employee. Eventually Don had an affair with Rachel. – Let’s dispel the notion that Betty Draper (see photo below) is an ice queen. Heck, she didn’t put the family pooch outside for the night, she tells Henry in bed. “It was cold outside…I locked him in the laundry room.” What a peach. – The night’s theme, indeed the entire series, can be summed up in Roger’s comment to Don in the aftermath of the Ad Age article, “Who knows who you are?”

Another lesson in breaking through the clutter came to us recently from AMC.

While it’s true that the AMC publicity mill already is in overdrive for the Season IV debut of hit series Mad Men (July 25, 10p), the press kit for another AMC original series brought exclamations of “Clever!” from the routinely dyspeptic journalists at our offices, whose initial reaction to mail is to pitch it toward the nearest abattoir.

The press kit in question touts Rubicon, a mysterious tale of the intelligence community told in a darkly depressing, nearly empty, low-tech setting. It stars James Badge Dale, whom you’ll recognize from his outstanding work in HBO’s Emmy-heavy The Pacific. The series begins Aug 1 at 8p, with back-to-back eps preceding Mad Men. (Actually, as CableFAX Daily reported, AMC snuck in Rubicon’s pilot after the season-concluding ep of another fine original, Breaking Bad. The first of 2 eps Aug 1 will be a re-showing of the pilot. For those who don’t want to wait AMC’s site has the full pilot available now.)

In a blog, Kim Potts at TV Squad provides 8 reasons to watch Rubicon, with #8 being the amount of thought that was put into the series’ title. The word Rubicon means a point after which one can’t return. “I appreciate that so much thought, obviously, went into the show’s name, and am taking it as one of many signs that just as much thought has gone into other aspects of the show,” Potts writes. There certainly was plenty of thought put into the Rubicon press kit by the always creative duo of Theano Apostolou and Olivia Dupuis, along with Dorothea Donnelly.

Inside the kit is a thumb disc encased in a small, crumpled paper envelope. The disc itself is in the shape of a key. There’s also a message scribbled on a piece of paper inside the envelope: ‘Don’t look back…it’s time,’ it says. Both the key and the message are elements in Rubicon’s pilot.

In most press kits there’s the obligatory packet of papers. But AMC has provided several interesting twists here. First, sealing the package is a sticker with the somewhat imposing logo of the American Policy Institute, a fictional NY City-based federal think-tank where Dale’s character, Will Travers, works.

The package’s contents are totally in keeping with the series, too. For all the important work it does, API is a decidedly low-tech place. Its drab interior is nearly devoid of the electronic gadgetry you’d expect to be de rigueur in an outpost of the intelligence community. You have to strain to find a desktop computer here. In fact, “the computer guy,” called Hal (in what must be a nod to the computer in Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey), is located in a cage in the basement. Travers and his colleagues trudge around hauling mountains of paper, similar to the packet AMC has included in the press kit.

And the papers inside the kit don’t disappoint. Like the API analysts receive each morning, journalists got a collection of covert-looking black and white photos and documents. Here, though, the shots show the series’ cast, complete with notes scribbled on them as to time, date and location of the photos. There’s also a crossword puzzle clipped out of a newspaper and a four-leaf clover (watch the pilot, you’ll see why these are important).

The tip off that this isn’t your garden-variety press kit comes in its 1-sheet, which reads: “Dear Journalist, After a thorough background check, you have been granted security clearance to access the enclosed classified information on AMC’s new original series…” A clever ending touch discusses the cast members. “Should you need to speak with any of these individuals for a one-on-one interrogation, we are willing to make the arrangements for you.”

With The Washington Post’s fascinating series about the U.S. intelligence community starting to dominate discussions in the area of the country where I am blogging, I think we can add yet another reason to Potts’ 8 why one will enjoy watching Rubicon this summer.

There are a lot of things, good and bad, being said about Yankees owner George M. Steinbrenner III today: the irascible personality, the meddling with and eventual firing of 22 managers (Donald Trump didn’t invent “You’re fired!”, George did), the sense of humor, the generosity and kindnesses, the appearances on SNL and his numerous ‘appearances’ on Seinfeld (where Larry David—face always obscured—played him). Whatever way you choose to think of him, you have to remember he was a revolutionary, a cable revolutionary.

The Boss, who was ahead of his time in many aspects of sports business, opened the floodgates for team-owned, regional sports networks, which found welcome venues on cable. Later there were cable operator-owned and cable programmer-owned sports networks.

As YES Network President/CEO Tracy Dolgin said today, “His vision of a team-owned regional sports network for the Yankees, resulting in the formation of the YES Network, revolutionized the sports business.” For this alone, Steinbrenner deserves mention (and probably a thank-you from everyone—including Mr Dolgin himself— whose livelihood is influenced by the flow of cable sports network dollars. So, thank you very much, Mr S).

Just think of it, without George cable operators would have had far fewer headaches. There would have been no wars between YES and Cablevision, for example.

Remember the a la carte proposition for sports nets that was a popular stopgap about 7 years ago? Those were fun days, right? And you thought George didn’t have a sense of humor.

And remember all those fun fights around 2003 between Time Warner and Fox Cable over sports nets rates? Wasn’t that a blast?

There would have been no shedding tears over sports tiers, which might not have existed without Steinbrenner’s YES.

Of course, as with most instances of change, plenty of people doubted Steinbrenner’s concept of a team-owned regional sports net. It was just another money grab, many said. Years ago it used to get hot at the National Show—or at least what passed for heat at those tightly scripted, well-mannered forum general sessions—when cable operators would warn team owners that they wouldn’t carry newly formed regional networks. That turned out not to be the case, especially when cable operators themselves began to enter the regional sports business. Well, at least it provided trade reporters with lead stories.

A much more subtle influence lives after George Steinbrenner. With the amount of money involved in certain team-owned sports networks, in baseball, especially, teams have a business reason, an imperative, actually, to win. Without a winning team, viewers won’t watch and ratings and ad rates will fall. The thing is, the unpredictability of sports in the free agent era tends to make winning a less-than-certain proposition. What a headache for team owners, who also own the sports network, right?

George had that covered. Being an old football man, he expected and demanded to win every game. And he opened his wallet to get many of the game’s best players to insure that he’d win every game. Of course in baseball if you lose 62 times in a season you probably win your division. Steinbrenner took a while to make peace with that. The result of his football mentality was that within about 5 years of his owning the Yankees, they began to win on a consistent basis. And YES Network is watched by more people than any other regional. That’s been the case on a consistent basis, too. A pretty good legacy.

In today’s fast-moving world it’s hard to remember what happened last week. It’s even more difficult to remember Showtime circa 2003, before Robert Greenblatt arrived.

In July of that year Greenblatt was given “a mandate to reinvigorate the Showtime brand…,” a press release announcing his departure as President of Entertainment said yesterday.

Reinvigorate? To reinvigorate something assumes it was once vigorous. With due respect, Showtime before 2003 lacked vigor.

That’s not to say Showtime didn’t try hard. In those days what Showtime lacked in quality and star power it made up for with quantity. Early on it seemed like Showtime released an original film almost every week. It was a remarkable output.

While the quality of most of the films didn’t cause HBO to worry, others were excellent. Varian’s War (2001), which starred William Hurt and Julia Ormond, told the little known story of an American socialite who’d seen how the Nazis were treating Jews in occupied France. In the end, with help from Eleanor Roosevelt, Varian Fry helped save some 2,000 artists and intellectuals from certain death.

Besides providing work for plenty of actors, writers and makeup people, the Showtime film factory also filled a journalistic void. Thanks to Showtime’s PR staff TV critics’ shelves always were loaded with material for review.

Showtime enjoyed a bit of momentum just prior to Greenblatt’s entrance. The network decided to zig where others zagged. Recognizing the paucity of solid dramas centered on non-whites, Showtime brought audiences the Latin-based Resurrection Blvd (2002-03, 53 eps) and Soul Food (2000-04, 74 eps), spun off from the 1997 theatrical of the same name.

What Greenblatt really did at Showtime was, again, as the press release said, “establish [it] as a leading premium subscription network with original programming.”

I can recall when Greenblatt was introduced to critics at TCA that year. Showtime chief Matt Blank told critics Showtime was going to vastly reduce its film output and concentrate on fewer but better productions. Greenblatt was going to attract big-name Hollywood talent to Showtime. The TCA critics, never known to be a gullible bunch, had their doubts. HBO still was the only game in town. Showtime was where you went when HBO turned you down.

The thing is, a few years later, Greenblatt and Blank had made good on their promises. Its TCA sessions were brimming with buzz-generating critics, who flocked to hear from big-name talent. Blank and Greenblatt had indeed made more, much more, out of less.

While HBO arguably remains the leader in many branches of programming, including dramas, original films, miniseries and documentaries, Showtime originals like Dexter, Weeds and Nurse Jackie have made the network a force. Although he’s too humble to admit it, that’s mostly Greenblatt’s doing. In a word, the brand is vigorous.

I don’t know about other television reporters, but with the many series that I am asked to review, my time for pleasure reading is cut down heavily.

I can’t imagine this is different for others in all aspects of the cable business, as a bevy of devices conveniently destroy what’s left of our leisure time that hasn’t already been reduced by other non-work obligations. Something has to go, and for many of us, it’s an opportunity for pleasure reading.

Some busy people find time to read. I’m not being political here, but I was impressed to find George W. Bush read nearly one book a week while he was this country’s chief executive. Karl Rove, Bush’s adviser and chief of staff, read even more. They had a yearly contest, initiated by Mr. Bush, to see who could complete the most tomes. One secret to the former president’s literary prowess, Rove tells us, was that while traveling, Bush eschewed television for books. Well, that gets me off the hook, right? Not really, since during my periodic trips on Air Force One I’ve watched television instead of cracking open a good read.

One of the major hurdles to reading, Evelyn Wood notwithstanding, is the time it takes to complete a book. Worse for me is the time it takes to finish a book versus the time it takes to knock off a television program. I derived a sense of accomplishment when I completed two of HBO’s miniseries, Band of Brothers and The Pacific, which I watched 3 times, finding new nuances each time. I’m still reading the books those series were based on. Who knows if I will complete those lengthy, but excellent, works?

There is hope, though. Oddly, it’s in the form of a book.

Recently, A&E’s marketing department sent TV reporters what looked to be a small paperback. Actually it was a script for an episode of The Glades, a Florida-based police series premiering July 11 at 10p. Generally, TV reporters receive a screener of upcoming series and a press kit. So, A&E’s package was a novel marketing idea (pardon the pun).

The 86-page script flew by in just 2 hours. Of course, with its large spacing designed to make it easy for actors and directors to read, the number of words on one script page is only a fraction of a garden variety novel’s page. OK, so I completed the equivalent of what would be a long-ish chapter in a novel. Maybe. Yet I had the satisfaction of completing a book.

There also was the added interest in that I am curious to see how the script will be adapted for television. Most important for A&E’s purposes, I read the entire script and now am aware of The Glades.

Another clever piece of marketing, A&E has been distributing this “book” on beaches in California, NY, NJ, Florida and Illinois, along with beach towels. It’s also partnered with Barnes & Noble, making the script in book form available free to customers in B&N stores nationwide and also as a free download for B&N’s 1.7 million Nook users and e-reader clients.

(New York) You know you’ve arrived when Donald Trump is invited to a party you throw and he shows up… more or less on time.

You’ve also arrived when The Donald refers to you as “a friend.”

By these standards 6-year-old TV One and Comcast chief Brian Roberts clearly have arrived.

TV One endangered the lives of about 200 young, hip and largely well-dressed people early Monday evening at Trump Tower in NY City—it allowed Mr Trump to get close to a microphone.

The occasion was a kick-off for TV One’s newest reality series, Donald J. Trump Presents The Ultimate Merger (premieres June 17, 9p). Fortunately, no lives were lost.

TV One either thinks master-dealer Trump really is the only person who can arrange a marital union for The Apprentice’s queen of nasty Omarosa (that’s the series’ premise—12 mostly hot, successful bachelors vie for Lady O’s hand in marriage) or it thinks Mr Trump’s name at the beginning of a series title will bring buzz, ratings and ad dollars. In this sense the word Trump can be used interchangeably with the word Oprah.

You can’t blame TV One if it catches Oprah fever. TV One chief Johnathan Rodgers used to run Discovery Channel. His current office in Silver Spring, Md, is across the street from Discovery, Oprah’s future employer. From his window Mr Rodgers has a bird’s eye view of the palatial headquarters of his former employer. This is Mr Rodgers’ neighborhood.

Of course you can and should blame the irresponsible barber who’s tending to the faded orange helmet atop Mr Trump’s head.

Will Trump and Omarosa mean gold for TV One? Time will tell. Clips of the series shown during the event had Omarosa putting the bachelors through their paces in various tests. There also was plenty of lip locking going on between Omarosa and the competing lads. Omarosa, who looked great in person, was also shown being massaged by the guys, wearing a bikini and, as is her rep, scolding the men. She’s also shown crying. Would it be a reality TV series if at least one person in the cast didn’t cry?

There were also glimpses of comedian George Wallace, TV One’s first homegrown talent, Chef G. Garvin, and a slew of what looked to be reality TV talent or wannabe’s.

Come to think of it, several people in the crowd at the event seemed to have come from the reality television genre.

That’s as far as we can go on a review of the series since the clips were barely audible over the din of guests drinking and networking in Mr Trump’s marble-laden tower. That was unfortunate. The noise also nearly drowned out Mr Trump’s remarks. For this we can be grateful.

Yet judging by the excitement Mr Trump generated when he arrived nearly 40 minutes late for his spiel on behalf of a series that credits him as executive producer, TV One managers, like original programming chief Toni Judkins and execs Jubba Seyyid and Craig Henry, made a decent bet. Mr Trump certainly has an aura. The crowd erupted.

And as if Brian Roberts and Comcast needed more accolades. Mr Trump praised “my friend Brian Roberts and all the wonderful people of Comcast…they do a great job.” Comcast owns TV One, Mr Trump told the crowd. (Well, Comcast is among the owners, along with Radio One, DirecTV and others).

Perhaps as important, Comcast also aims to own the network that carries The Apprentice, a series Mr Trump mentioned several times in his remarks. The Apprentice has helped push Mr Trump back into the ranks of pop culture superstardom. Talk about the ultimate merger.

‘Dying is easy. Comedy is hard.’

Those words are attributed to several who’ve tried to make people laugh. If she does stand-up, Betty White should be able to milk that aphorism with a shot at her character in the upcoming Ohio-based TV Land series. “Well, I haven’t died yet…but I’m in Cleveland, so what’s the difference?”

The thing is, Hot in Cleveland, which premieres June 16 at 10p, comes at a time when White is hot, thanks to a Super Bowl commercial for Snickers and a heralded appearance on Saturday Night Live . Based on the pilot episode TV Land sent critics, Hot in Cleveland won’t do much harm to the veteran comedian’s camp appeal. It might even help.

Here White plays the Sophia Petrillo role from The Golden Girls. You know, the old lady who gets the best lines, many of which are raunchy. With age comes wisdom. In comedy, age brings forgiveness. Sophia can be as brusque and bawdy as she pleases. At her age, it’s cute, right? White’s Elka Ostrovsky has been granted the same comedic privileges.

One of the main differences here is that while middle-aged Estelle Getty was playing an octogenarian, White actually is 88. And she looks a bit stooped over in the pilot. Fortunately, she’s kept much of her comedic timing. And, yes, she gets most of the best lines. They’re not as golden as in The Golden Girls or even Will and Grace, whose Sean Hayes, who played the hilarious Jack in that series, is Hot’s executive producer. Those comedies had well-developed characters whose personalities emerged during years of episodes. Will Hot get that chance? We’ll see. Still, the Hot pilot has its moments.

Much of the pilot’s best spots belong to Valerie Bertinelli. Of course plenty of people will tune in to Hot just for the age factor—to judge who among this veteran cast has aged the best or worst. Let me ruin the suspense, Bertinelli gleams. Suspend belief and she’s no longer 50, but Barbara Cooper, the wholesome teen of One Day at a Time (1975-84). The high-pitched voice remains, as does the cute-as-a-button smile. And thanks to Jenny Craig, her teen figure is back. Almost. An ill-advised, skin-tight, black stretch number she wears in the pilot confirms she no longer has Barbara Cooper’s slim hips and superior derriere. But, heck, how can we compare her figure with the one she had 30+ years ago?

To be fair, Bertinelli’s pleasant nature in the pilot is partly due to her character. Unlike her fictional friends in this series, played by Jane Leeves and Wendie Malick, Bertinelli’s Melanie Moretti is not supposed to be Hollywood jaded. She’s single and a writer looking for adventure and romance. Still, she’s the only one of the four actresses who seems to be enjoying herself. To watch Bertinelli smile for 30 minutes will be reason enough for some to tune in.

Leeves, always the weak link in Frasier, plays a nails-and-eyebrows person to the stars (including Oprah). For some reason she seems dyspeptic here. White, as we said, appears worried about tipping over. Malick, who plays an old-by-Hollywood-standards soap actress, seems disinterested in the whole thing. Again, this all could be acting, time will tell.

Still this quartet of comedy veterans makes the show’s pilot worth your time. They’re easy to watch, to laugh with and at. White still does funny pretty well and at 50 Valerie Bertinelli still is pretty. More than that, give TV Land credit for attempting to make people laugh, which, as we said at the top, can be tougher than dying.

If you’re like most of us, many of the trade shows, though terrific, tend to blend together. Again, if you’re like many, your calendar for The Cable Show, excuse me, Spring Connection Week, is beginning to get crowded.

That’s why if you arrive in LA by Monday afternoon, May 10, I’d like to make a humble proposal. If you want to have a bit of fun and walk away with some thoughts that will help you keep the week distinct in the memory bank, head to the Union Rescue Mission, 545 S. San Pedro St, between 4:30pm and 7:30pm.

You’ll find a band of folks from The Sportsman Channel, Sportsmen Against Hunger and a slew of cable folk preparing food for some 1,000 needy citizens. It’s part of Sportsman’s Hunt Fish Feed Campaign, an effort that’s served more than 6,200 meals across the country since it began, humbly, feeding about 200 homeless folks at Central Union Mission in Washington, DC, before a CTAM Summit in July of 2007.

What makes all this possible, besides the good organizing work of Sportsman Channel and its partners and the meat donated by local hunters, is the elbow grease and spirit of more than 400 good folk, some from Sportsman, a politician or two, plenty of volunteers from local cable operators (and of course some attendees of trade shows, when Hunt Fish Feed coincides with those events). The camaraderie that develops is palpable.

To RSVP for this good work, go to HFF@thesportsmanchannel.com or for more information, see: www.huntfishfeed.org

Even though you might be a bit physically tired after this experience, you’ll be otherwise invigorated and you’ll have no trouble remembering Spring Connection Week 2010.

The Cable Show became a lot more fun earlier this week. No, I’m not talking about NBCU-Comcast’s announcement that it will treat all to a night at a Universal theme park. The fun came when TBS announced that Conan O’Brien was leaving the dark side of broadcast to come to the hip groove of cable. Thank you, Steve Koonin and TBS.

There’s no doubt that top cable operators will be lining up to party with O’Brien next month in Los Angeles at The Cable Show. TBS must bring him to L.A.

Look, Conan is scheduled to be in Denver doing his stand-up tour on Monday, May 10 and doesn’t have another show until May 13, in Dallas, Texas. He’s coming to L.A., no sweat.

Heck, I’d bet even money that at this very moment The Cable Show’s impresario Barbara York is on the phone with Koonin trying to arrange for Conan to be a surprise guest at the show. Can you imagine Conan walking out on the stage at Staples, ‘interrupting’ a general session? Would cable, TBS and O’Brien get major press on that sort of stunt?
Are you kidding?

Everyone will remember The Cable Show of 2010 as “the one that Conan attended.” In short it will be the Conan show.

An aside: Will Conan attend Turner’s Upfront in NY on May 19? Bet on it. He’s scheduled to be in Chicago that evening, and Turner’s presentation begins in the morning, so, yeah, he’s hitting that one.

Slow Down

But after the hype (and there will be plenty—O’Brien’s deal with TBS promises a major marketing blitz for Conan, something TBS does extremely well, strategically and tactically), what does Conan’s move to cable mean really?

Conan won’t make cable’s ad numbers instantly better than broadcast’s, although it should narrow an already closing gap a bit more. George Lopez, whose late-night talker will move to a later slot for Conan, has done reasonably well in terms of ratings. Conan will push ratings up for TBS and for Lopez.

Will Conan bring instant credibility to cable and TBS? Do either cable or TBS need it? Of course not. In many but not all respects, cable is no longer David to broadcast’s Goliath. Just look at Emmy and Golden Globes totals if you need further proof. (Conan probably should thank David Chase, James Gandolfini, Edie Falco and Jon Stewart for helping solidify a place for him to practice his craft.)

More than that, in Hollywood cable has a reputation for allowing artistic freedom and experimentation. That’s due in part to looser FCC language restrictions, but it’s also a question of aesthetics and expression. Conan apparently was drawn to TBS by the perception that the cable network would be less stuffy than a broadcast home. His people were also impressed by TBS’ nimbleness; reportedly Conan’s team was amazed at how promptly Turner Entertainment chief Koonin and company responded during negotiations. That’s a Koonin hallmark.

Still, cable is perceived by many as a latecomer, so TBS should ride the Conan publicity wave for as long as they can and enjoy listening to people who say that cable’s trumped broadcast with O’Brien. With perception being reality, this is not a bad thing for cable.

In reality, though, Conan is only the latest in a long line of big-name talent to realize that cable is a proven and legitimate platform. Artists like Glenn Close know this, as do a slew of talented people working with HBO and Showtime, including Tom Hanks and Steve Spielberg, Al Pacino and Toni Collette. News icons like Ted Koppel and Dan Rather know it, too.

While it’s true that since his habitat is late-night talk, Conan’s taking somewhat of a pioneering role for cable, although he’s not a Cable Pioneer.

In truth Conan is yet another good gamble by masterful dealer and astute businessman Koonin, whose long stated stated intention has been to remain a cable network but act like a broadcast net. In effect, he’s turned the tables on the broadcast networks many times before his latest deal. He’s been doing so for years, deftly picking up broadcast series like Seinfeld, The Office and The Family Guy for TBS and picking off the critically acclaimed but canceled (by NBC) police series Southland for TNT. Other feathers in his cap include launching The Closer and Saving Grace.

Besides his business success, Mr. Koonin is known for his sense of humor and his affinity for smiling. If things go well in November when Mr. O’Brien begins his 4-night/week gig with TBS, the team of Conan and Koonin should have plenty to smile about.

It was an historic evening—the first 3D broadcast of the men’s NCAA basketball championship game. The announcers for CBS’ 3D feed—Dave Ryan and Steve Lappas—reminded viewers of that a bit more frequently than seemed necessary.

After watching Monday evening’s game in a huge movie theater in suburban Washington, D.C., one of 55 nationwide to show the game in 3D, some observations:

1. The format definitely improves the excitement of college basketball. There’s a wow factor, although not as much as the move to HD from SD. Some had fears that the 3D picture would make viewers feel as if players were falling into your lap on occasion, similar to how cinema has exploited 3D. Those concerns didn’t materialize. The only time something seemed to float right into one’s face was when the game ended and confetti came streaming down.

In fact, the players and the live action on the court weren’t the best things in 3D last night. Views of the crowd and the graphics, which seem to float on air, touchable, right in front of the viewer, were the highlights. Slow-moving objects, like the Duke Blue Devil and Butler bulldog mascots, or those that were stationary, like the backboard or a player standing on the foul line waiting to shoot with the huge crowd of 70,000 behind him, looked exceptionally good in 3D. Objects moving relatively slowly and in synch looked great, too. For example, the Duke cheer squad’s choreographed dances were effective in 3D, as were the timed, arm-waving cheers of the Butler students.

2. Slow-motion instant replays were excellent, viewers were able to easily pick up the ball’s rotation and were much better than live action, which, as you’ll see below, had its problems. Vince Pace, who developed the cameras used in Avatar, designed the camera rigs for the CBS feed. He’ll be working with ESPN for 3D coverage of The Masters later this week. Considering how well stationary and slow-moving objects and crowds look in HD, The Masters in 3D should be terrific. (We’ll be blogging about that, too.)

3. The most noticeable problems were with the wide, horizontal shots, the traditional cover angle, which showed players moving up and down the court. Players appeared slightly blurry. By no means did this greatly hinder the coverage, but it was noticeable and a bit distracting. It made this viewer long for the acuity of an HD picture. Perhaps that’s why CBS in the 2nd half moved much of its coverage to overhead cameras that looked down on the court and the backboard, which provided a very satisfying perspective.

4. Several times during the night the picture died or pixilated and a loud, unpleasant sound came booming from theater speakers. This happened about 6 or 7 times throughout the evening, including during a crucial moment late in the 2nd half when a Butler player was driving to the basket. The crowd seemed relatively forgiving of these interruptions.

What was much more difficult were the commercials. This special feed took the same commercial breaks as the normal broadcast, but the 3D feed kept running the same 4-5 commercials, over and over. And the commercials—a mix of CBS promos for upcoming shows and ads for the evening’s sponsor LG—didn’t distinguish themselves as good or bad for HD.

5. The contrast between live action and taped pieces was marked. A preview of a new We Are The World video for Haiti during half-time seemed to show off 3D much better than the live action basketball did. Another taped piece, about racial history and an Indiana high school, was well-made, but 3D didn’t seem to do much to enhance its sepia-tone and old black-and-white footage.

6. It seems 3D (at least as it’s set up now) isn’t for everybody. In a theater with hundreds of seats, there were at most 20 people attending last night’s showing. More important but not a scientific event, one patron was forced to leave about 20 minutes into the broadcast after complaining of nausea from the 3D. For nearly everyone else, the coverage was a happening, a pioneering event to be treasured. Many viewers felt as if they were “present at the creation” of 3D in live sports TV. In this respect, CBS should be proud of its debut. Of course the fact that the game between Butler and Duke was like a great boxing match, with each side inflicting blows and the outcome in the balance until literally the final second, didn’t hurt at all.