Holy Shift or The Oddities of the Cable Life

[Updated Wed, March 10, 1:15pm ET]

Item 1: I Never Said That

Driving late on a Sunday night in Washington, D.C., passing the Pentagon, listening to C-SPAN Radio (one of the delights of living in this area). C-SPAN Radio is playing a tape of President Lyndon Johnson speaking on the phone in 1968 with Senate Minority Leader Everett M. Dirksen (R-IL).

Much of the conversation between the two old-boy politicians centers on the President’s displeasure with a Republican presidential candidate’s comments to the press that LBJ hasn’t been keeping him abreast of developments in Vietnam. A very tired-sounding Johnson (who had already announced he would not seek re-election) essentially tells Dirksen to stifle the Republican hopeful, a fellow by the name of Richard M. Nixon. LBJ tells Dirksen forcefully: When I have something to tell [Nixon], I will. Dirksen accepts this and assures the President he will deliver the message.

Then LBJ tells Dirksen not to mention to the press that he (Dirksen) is doing this job for the President. I understand, Dirksen says, adding, “This phone call never took place.”

Oh, but it did. And we just heard proof of it on C-SPAN Radio. It makes one think of several things: with all the digital technology that exists today, will there come a time when public figures or even ordinary citizens will be able to do anything that won’t be recorded and replayed at a later date? And are there things we do today that years from now we will say never happened? The first thing I think of is the illegal downloading of cable shows, which seems to be the norm with so many people.

Item 2: HBO’s Fighting Words

Is there any way to be 100% certain that your content is protected? Last summer, when Mad Men creator Matt Weiner wanted to protect the AMC series’ season 3 finale last year, he eschewed sending an advance screener to critics and television writers. On the other hand, he wrote a disarming note explaining his decision.

HBO seems to have taken the most clear steps to protect its content. Burned into the screeners that it sends critics is a security code. It’s been doing this for years. (AMC has just begun to do so, as have other networks.) HBO also is one of the few cable nets that asks critics to return screeners.

For the upcoming miniseries The Pacific, HBO went even further. In a letter to critics, HBO EVP Quentin Schaffer gave recipients several more options. For example, Schaffer said critics could shred or break the discs after viewing them. “Should you choose to return them to HBO, please email us…and we will send you an airbill or postage-paid envelope for your convenience in doing so.”

The letter goes on to tell us that “each DVD has been watermarked with a unique identifier that allows us to identify you as the source of any unauthorized copies.”

Finally, “in the event any of the above is unacceptable to you, please hold the DVDs and email us at … so that we may arrange for their return. These DVDs may not be lent, copied, sold, given away, or otherwise transferred, to any third party for any reason.”

I’m wondering if I tell HBO that I want to shred or break my discs whether or not they will send me sharp knives or a blunt instrument?

Item 3: The Devil is in the Details at Showtime

In marketing, if you got it, flaunt it. Subtlety is not appreciated, right? Not so. We can’t help but be amused by Showtime’s campaign for season 2 of Nurse Jackie, the Edie Falco vehicle that returns March 22.

The press kit features a half-smiling Falco, who plays a drug-addicted nurse, surrounded by a bevy of pills, needles, eye droppers and syringes. The kit itself is shaped like a capsule. The tag line is “Holy Shift.” (Falco’s character works in a hospital run by a religious group.) Fine, obvious fun.

The really good stuff, though, is contained on and around the screener. First, the screener is an egg-white color and the word “Aspirin” is printed across the top. And then, where you’d expect it to say “episodes 1-7″ it says “doses 1-7.” Cute, but how many critics are going to bother to look? And there’s more fun on the back cover of the kit where the Showtime logo sits. Beneath that logo is the logo for the series’ producer Lionsgate, which resides on a bandage affixed to the page. Again, subtle, cute and appreciated by a few of us.

Item IV: Prison Life

Is there no space that’s safe from advertising? What appeared to be a friendly reminder for tonight’s Washington, DC, gala touting Discovery Channel’s epic nature documentary Life had a secondary objective.

Just below the lines reminding guests of the time, place and parking situation for the evening’s gala at the Andrew W. Mellon Auditorium, we see the following, looking like another line of information for the event: “For better or worse, for richer or poorer, America’s leading investigation network, Investigation Discovery, presents PRISON WIVES on Wednesdays at 10 PM. This captivating new hit series profiles men and women who have fallen in love despite the fact that one spouse is serving time behind bars.”